You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
