Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
