And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
