How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize
