That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
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