1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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