it wasn't lemon gatorade
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Randomize
