so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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