You're so nebulous sometimes
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
