Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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