As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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