It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize