the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
