butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
