Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
