i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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