i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
