Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
