Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize