just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Randomize
