He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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