If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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