Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
4 words: hood of his car
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Randomize
