farters have to be the big spoon...
lets start a swedish sibling band together
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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