There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
