I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
