Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
