So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
