I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
