one might say we're banned from that church
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
