I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
