i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
