I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
