Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize
