Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
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