I didn't shave. On purpose
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
