shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
