talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
