OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
he quoted the bible to break up with me
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
