he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
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