so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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