You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Randomize
