You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
