I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Randomize