my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
