one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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