i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
