it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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