If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I don't think brook has ever known best
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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