I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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